It's Not You
Identifying and Healing from Narcissistic People
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It's Not You
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Ramani Durvasula PhD
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Ramani Durvasula PhD
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INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER
From clinical psychologist and expert in narcissistic relationships Dr. Ramani Durvasula, a guide to protecting and healing yourself from the daily harms of narcissism
AN OPEN FIELD PUBLICATION FROM MARIA SHRIVER
It’s not always easy to tell when you’re dealing with a narcissist. One day they draw you in with their confidence and charisma, the next they gaslight you, wreck your self-confidence, and leave you wondering, What could I have done differently?
As Dr. Ramani Durvasula reveals in It's Not You, the answer is: absolutely nothing. Just as a tiger can’t change its stripes, a narcissist won’t stop manipulating and invalidating you. To heal in the aftermath of their abuse and protect yourself from future harm, you first have to accept that you are not to blame.
Deeply compassionate and revelatory, It’s Not You examines how narcissists hijack our wellbeing and offers a healing path forward. Drawing on more than 20 years of studying, teaching, and helping clients navigate the landscape of narcissism, Dr. Durvasula unpacks the oft-misunderstood personality, showing how to identify the telltale signs that you may be dealing with a narcissist and protect yourself from their toxic influence. Along the way, you’ll learn how to become gaslight resistant, chip away at the trauma bonds that keep us stuck in these cycles, grieve the losses, create realistic boundaries, learn the fine art of discernment, and recover your sense of self after years of invalidation.
Healing and thriving after or even during a narcissistic relationship can be challenging, but it is possible. It's Not You shows that the first step is to stop trying to change the narcissistic person, stop blaming yourself, and start giving yourself permission to foster your autonomy and sense of self outside of this relationship.
©2024 Ramani Durvasula (P)2024 Penguin Audio
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Commentaires
“A must read. Dr. Ramani will teach you how to heal from any toxic relationship. With her expert advice based on decades of research and clinical experience, she makes the impossible seem possible.”–Mel Robbins, bestselling author of The High Five Habit and host of The Mel Robbins Podcast
“Dr. Ramani has written the book on narcissism for our times, not simply because it upends everything we thought we knew about this personality, but because it gives real people a sense of hope…that they can heal, that they can move forward from these relationships, that it’s not you.”–Maria Shriver
“In writing It's Not You, Dr. Durvasula directly addresses victims of narcissistic abuse with targeted advice developed through years of clinical experience and research. I would highly recommend this book to anyone struggling in a relationship with a narcissist. Once you realize it's not you who is the problem, you can become the solution.”–W. Keith Campbell, PhD, professor of psychology at the University of Georgia and author of The Narcissism Epidemic
Ce que les auditeurs disent de It's Not You
Moyenne des évaluations utilisateurs. Seuls les utilisateurs ayant écouté le titre peuvent laisser une évaluation.Commentaires - Veuillez sélectionner les onglets ci-dessous pour changer la provenance des commentaires.
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Global5 out of 5 stars
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Interprétation5 out of 5 stars
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Histoire5 out of 5 stars
- Marie-Ange Audige
- 04/04/2024
Woooooooow… Life Changing!!!!!!
I bought a physical copy to keep, re-read, and share with others… The information in this book is INVALUABLE. It’s what Ive been needing to hear for years now. I feel so seen, acknowledged, justified and allowed to EXIST! As a truth-teller/seer, life has been lonely, tumultuous and confusing. I’ve been grieving a lot of things without a term for it or validation around me, nor from me. I am so glad to know i can stop gaslighting myself. It was them, it was always them, not me! I can stop bending backwards in all these one-sided relationships and friendships, and finally turn my back on my mom without feeling guilty or like I haven’t tried enough. No. No more pain, no more suffering, no more perfectionism, no more people pleasing, no more shame, no more guilt, no more self-doubt, no more calibrating to others first. It is time for me to re-discover who I am and re-introduce myself to the world. Thank you thank you thank you, Dr. Ramani. You are one of God’s great messengers and I am sooooo grateful for you.
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Global5 out of 5 stars
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Interprétation5 out of 5 stars
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Histoire5 out of 5 stars
- Gallma
- 27/08/2024
Honest. Clear. Useful.
A precious guide to navigate narcissistic relationships. Helps me understand how to better be present and supportive for my partner who has been in a toxic relationship with a narcissistic person for over 20 years. And still co-parenting with her.
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