In June 2022, at the Black Men’s Forum (BMF), we went to the source and provided a platform for African American men and a few African American male teenagers to speak their truths in answering 58 questions. All information shared is a part of history and will be passed onto the next generation to build upon society and learn about the strengths and hindrances affecting African-American boys. The names of the participants will remain anonymous to protect privacy. Their insight and advice are life changing—if applied.

Our intent was to compile data to understand African American males’ relationships, in their youth, with their mothers. However, in listening to the questionnaires, it became clear that some of the responses were very revealing, compelling, and needed to be formatted into stories (letters) to aide in our quest to help African American mothers better understand the needs of their sons. We pay special homage to those who graciously accepted our invitation to write their personal stories. Some of stories shared are based on the author’s interviews, relationship, or experience with the storytellers who did not participate in the BMF.

Chapters one through 11 are in chronological order according to age, occupation (when appropriate), and title. As a special tribute, the author included chapter one (Cuddling) and chapter two (Understanding) to highlight her grandsons’ relationships with their mothers. The titles in each letter represents the common theme in each person’s story. The title also highlights an area that the mother impressed upon her son, either positively, for example (leadership), or negatively (guilt). In a few situations, the son still desires and yearns for validation from their mothers. In one story, the black male carried the guilt to his grave.

Some of the letters are encouraging while others reveal pain and suffering. You will also hear inspirational testimonials that will encourage Black mothers to keep doing what they are doing. Their actions are effectively helping their sons to be the best they can be. Detailed responses to questions one through 39 are shown in chapter 14, including responses from those who did not attend the BMF.

It is not the author’s intent to blame the mother nor the son, but rather to seek an understanding and conclude with recommended tools based on the responses to the questions, hopefully to strengthen relations between African American mothers and their sons. The author highlights in this book are mother-son relationships that are working well. We commend those mothers for a job well done.

Chapter 18 is designated for mothers to interact with her sons to perhaps get answers from him that she had not asked previously.

I am Cassandra J. Howard. I am walking in faith to fulfill God’s assignment, serving as a conduit, hearing, receiving, and documenting information. My desire for this book is to deliver data, information, and letters to African American mothers with hope and prayer that they will be receptive to the positive and constructive feedback.