This month, a densely-woven Jon's been struggling to keep his mind out of the gutter by smearing a microphone thinly over the top of a modest vape rig and pushin a pre-1994 Barbie doll into a red cabbage, while serving borscht to a red-headed widow. Mike, though, has officially been busier than him, scribbling a 10-year callback on manuscript at 3am and shouting 'Number!' at other podcasters in a hell of his own making. Nevertheless, he's found time to brush aside Will Smith's slap (despite living under a Rock) and consider this year's Oscar-nominated songs. We hear about Billie Eilish trying not to suck. Van Morrison's car-horn brass and BV shred-concealment. A drone-dodging Reba McEntire losing her precariously balanced hat. And Beyonce leaving her ornamental trombonists unpainted for want of a euphoniumist's chair. In other news, we channel George Massenburg through the Tamagotchi recorder to capture the finest one-dimensional voltage wobbles, and (once we've recovered from our pre-shawm flinch) hear a swanee saxophonist making bubblegum instrumentalists sound like skill minnows. All in all, it's an intense emotional struggle with a fretless foghorn on a slightly elevated sofa.

To hear Jon's latest single 'Lie To Me', head over to https://linktr.ee/whittenand_

And you can find Mike's super-grammatical tuning video at https://www.patreon.com/posts/61727565

Thanks to Benn Jordan and Daniel Vaczi for allowing me to use the glissotar demonstration featured in this episode. Check out Benn's youtube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCshObcm-nLhbu8MY50EZ5Ng and Daniel's incredible performances with the Glissonic Trio at https://danielvaczi.bandcamp.com

Fancy more of our nonsense? Then please support the podcast at https://www.patreon.com/projectstudioteabreak and check out the merch store at https://www.projectstudioteabreak.com/merch For more episodes, as well as links relating to each one (via our zero-spam but 100-percent-idiocy mailing list), check out https://www.projectstudioteabreak.com. Or get in touch by email at teabreak@projectstudioteabreak.com.